Our MENtality: How Our Minds Affect Everything

We often Ignore the State of our Mental Well-being...Until its Too Late

Lack of control meant everything he worked for would leave him.

And yet its his control in a choke hold that led to his own losses.

Still he'd ignore the signs in his body, fighting on.

That's all he'd ever known.

From the fists his father laid on him, forcing him to fight.

Another nod of control.

~ From Our MENality: How Man Up Culture Destroys its Men

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Abandon the Mental and you'll regret it in the Physical

I've always found it interesting how much emphasis we place on health and wellness,

or rather on the Physical aspect of our well-being.

Think about it for a moment.

Those of us that don't hate doctors (or are terrified of getting shots or being told something in our flawless temples of flesh is gone awry) tend to stay on top of our Annual or Semi-annual check-ups.

The same can be said for Dental, Vision, and even Physical Therapy when it comes down to it.

Men, lets be real, since this is about us - we wanna look our best, feel our best, to attract the best.

Then, when we get the best, we can't settle...we gotta get BETTER!

The constant drive to perform, achieve, grow, etc.

We get on these trendy diets we see on Social Media or hear about from friends, and hit the gym like a gorilla ready to bash someone's face in - because we have to look like a man. We have to feel like a man.

What we do physically reinforces the indoctrination we have ALL received through venues and people we held close to the chest: Parents, Friends, Religious Leaders, Celebrities, Gurus, Books, Articles, Influencers, Characters, and dare I say Bloggers 😂. Physical effort, at a subconscious level, reinforces what we've been taught to believe as "our truth," based on someone else's guidance and interpretation. Or better yet, based on societal standards that are never really questioned, just accepted so that we fit in and look the part.

But that's the interesting part.

We reinforce the beliefs and values stored in our minds through physicality, grit, determination, hustle, grind, loyalty, respect, audacity, ambition, survival instinct, desperation - and yet, we PUSH OUR MINDS TO THE SIDE!

We drive ourselves to be perfect men getting the bag and everything that comes with it, but perhaps our greatest muscle is left unchecked. Our minds are not worked out. Not checked out. Not getting its regular maintenance intervals like we would a vehicle or motorcycle. We don't take advantage of the extended warranty to ensure our minds are kept in alignment with the grind, wear, and tear on our bodies.

Why?

Because taking a knee for our Mental Health is seen as a hindrance. It's weak sauce. Its not the Alpha or Sigma way. It doesn't make you a high value man which means you ain't getting no bread and you ain't getting no ladies. CURSES!!! Foiled Again!! (Dastardly voice. IYKYK)

Even better, taking a knee for Mental Health means you won't make enough to break even...to cover down on the lifestyle you know damn well you shouldn't be trying to live but you do - because of other people!

SO what do we men do? We work past the breaking point. We grind harder. We ignore the drag we feel. The pain, the inner turmoil creeping up, the anxiety, the stress, the phantoms of trauma from the past - all coming to tell us "Bruh, its time. Come listen to me. We need to regroup."

But alas we ignore it. We block it out.

We work more hours than we sleep and spend with our families, all to chase a phantom of a dream we won't grasp or appreciate when we get it.

We Party and Bulls***. (s/o to Biggie)

We light up.

We drink.

We buy stuff to floss our swag.

We put the macketh down and collect bodies "cuz that's what N**** do." (s/o to Tupac)

We avoid vulnerability, because it reminds us of what lingers behind the scenes like a bad Director's Cut.

We avoid real connection, because eventually they'll catch the cracks in our mask of achievements, titles, accolades, and dollar bills.

But as the world turns and we run from the inevitable,

Our mental stamina runs out, just like in the physical.

When we run too hard, we are forced to breathe and stop - and we hate it!

Our bodies break down because we ignored the biological red flags.

We kept speeding through the red lights and now our Mental is the Cop pulling us over in the dark night of the soul.

"You know why you're here right?"

"Nagh Officer I don't. But I really gotta be somewhere like right now."

"I'm sorry but I need you to step out the vehicle after you pop the trunk. It's time to look inside."

Busted.

You had your chance, but you ignored it.

Now you're locked up physically. Your mental angst now a penitentiary of woes.

The Cyclops from X-Men burn in your eyes from lack of sleep.

The irregular heartbeat, produced by Kanye West and the Neptunes from all that Grindin'.

Your back hurts beyond measure from the weight you carried in anger, a slave to your beliefs, time, generations, and the game.

Your arms tingle, your legs pulse erratically from walking endlessly with your mind in a fog.

Your face creased with a long scowl to make Batman determine you a threat, because nothing you did worked against the flow of gravity of your inner disdain.

Your mind controls your flow, and you can't continue because you have no more credits.

Countdown ticking away your life as you panic.

Battling the societal narrative with the inner voice telling you look inward to find your truth.

To breathe. That you will be okay.

This is part of the process.

At your worst, you blame the universe, your Deities, and many others for your struggles - and decide the only way out of your suffering is to be gone...a disservice to the life you could still yet live.

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Food for Thought: How Our Mind Affects Everything

I've had many conversations with people that didn't stop to take a knee for their mental health. Men and Women alike. So many reasons why they couldn't and yet they lived in pain, getting more intense by the day: Physically, Emotionally, Mentally, even Spiritually.

Our minds are powerful and we must treat it as such, along with the rest of our bodies.

Can't have a great body without a sound mind.

Let me break it down for you.

Disclaimer: what I highlight on may not align with your faith or religious beliefs or practices, and that's okay...but perhaps there is relativity. I am merely sharing insight from resources I have researched and took interest in. These are my interpretations, which of course may vary from others.

The first two Hermetic Principles listed in the Kybalion highlight that "The All is Mind; The Universe is Mental" and "As Above, So Below; As Below So Above."

The First Principle, known as the Principle of Mental-ism, reminds us that we have the power to conceive, on a mental level, to determine the scope of the Universe. It's a nod that tells us our thoughts carry vast power. The power to take action, the power to make a choice, the power to agree or disagree, the power to change the course of our lives, and more importantly, the power to create! It also loosely eludes to the relativity of all things within it. Everything is connected by way of the mental space.

Chew on that for a moment.

The Second Principle, known as the Principle of Correspondence, further reminds us the nature of relativity between many things. We cannot know one thing without the other. We cannot fully function with one aspect of life, without the other. Think about it from a Solar System standpoint. The Sun is at the center. Everything revolves around it, and yet the Sun also revolves around something- the rest of the galaxy itself. Galaxies swirl in the vastness of space, also part of the Universe as we perceive it.

Think about Earth and its phases. Cycling between the light during the day, and the darkness of night. if the Earth didn't revolve and spin on its axis, we would not be here living the way we are now.

Another example is a vehicle. A vehicle needs fuel to run. A vehicle needs a functioning engine to run as well. If we ignore the check engine light too many times our vehicle will fall apart, stall, and no longer work.

The whole and its parts carry the same weight of importance, so we have to account for all of it. This concept applies to our bodies as well.

If our mind is in flux, how can we truly function at 100% without issue? We can only fake it for so long. Our mind has many degrees of influence and control on our bodies. We store information and yet the mind controls body functions at a subconscious level. With such a marvelous part of the body we should be safeguarding it from overwork, the same way we need to take care of other aspects of our body. When our bodies break, our bodies feel it with the sense of anguish and pain. It tells us this hurts or harms us.

We cannot ignore that anymore.

Taoist teachings also confirm relativity. There is no understanding of the light without darkness. There is no good without evil and vice versa. There is no calm and peace without chaos and war. No rest without working. There is no mind without the body, and no body without the mind.

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Men's MENtal Call to Action

Men.

Lets stop ignoring minds and bodies!

Lets stop pushing through when we know we're hurting....tired...at wits end.

Lets stop grinding when we know it doesn't serve us.

When we know we're just doing to be doing.

To be seen through effort and not seen in a chair talking to a Mental Health professional.

Nagh bruh.

We NEED to be talking to that Mental health professional, that friend, that trusted person,

So they can tell us about the struggles we hide in the closet.

Real recognizes real, right King?

Kings have advisors to offer checks and balances.

We are no different.

Because when we ignore even our own mental counsel,

our kingdom is doomed to collapse.

Its inevitable...like a Thanos snap.

So I'll ask you my brother, whats stopping you really?

What skeletons you you strain to hold back in the dungeon catacombs of your Mental?

Why do you push so hard and ignore your mind?

Because no one else can do it?

Because you are depended on to perform and provide?

Because people will look at you different? Leave you? Abandon you? Ridicule You?

Don't be ashamed of your answers. Keep it real.

Tell me, tell someone that you trust.

Don't keep it bottled up, grit your teeth and Man up.

Because Man Up is the Quickest way to take the Fall...

and you're half way there.

Stay tuned for the next and final drop in the series, when I talk about the importance of the connections in our lives and what they can do to empower and support us.

Last thing, My footer now includes a section for fellow writers doing the work in support of overall mental health and wellness. We are in trying times and we need every bit of help we can get. Please check their respective pages out and gather knowledge from them. Soak in their experiences as it may not only relate to you, but also help you make a difference in your own life. THAT is why WE do this.

Until next time, lets stay #WRITEntangled